Monday, March 29, 2010

I'm getting better at this whole listening thing....I think

My sister in-law told me something today that really made me kind of upset. Not because she said anything wrong, but because what she said was exactly right, and I didn't want to hear it. I didn't throw a fit or anything immature, ;) but when our conversation ended, I knew she had told me something about myself that was true, and that I'm going to have to change. And that wasn't exactly.....fun.

We were talking about the relationship I have with my dad, and I told her that it's not my responsibility to show my dad what it looks like to be respectful. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that it's not my responsibility to respect my dad. I'm saying that it was his job to treat his family and those around him with respect, so that in return, we (his children) would know what it looked like to respect others, and in doing so, he would not only earn our respect, but show us what it looked like to respect him. Does that make sense? When you're a six year old little girl being screamed and cussed at by your father about how you don't respect him enough, call me crazy, but that doesn't naturally evoke in me, a desire to respect him. Nor does it show me how to. All that does is show me how undeserving that person is of anyone's respect. Maybe that's harsh...And maybe it's not true, but either way, that's how I've always felt.
Anyways, back to our conversation. I told her how I felt about the matter of respecting him, and about my "six years old being screamed at by my father experience", and you know what she told me?

She told me, "That might fly when your six, but you're almost 18 now, and God has shown you what it looks like to respect others. Now it's your job to do so, weather or not your dad ever taught you. It's your job to be who God has called you to be, and that means showing your dad respect, whether or not he does the same for you in return."

F. She's right. I hate that.

But in all honesty, I'm so glad she had the guts to tell me that. After thinking about all of this today I came to the realization of just how blessed I am to have a few people in my life that aren't afraid to give me constructive criticism. Turns out it can be a good thing. Who knew, right?! ;)

Don't get me wrong though--There's definitely a BIG difference between constructive criticism, and just trying to get your own selfish point across during those moments where you think you know everything. And I'm definitely guilty of the second one.

I read something today that I thought was really cool. It was said in a very different context then how I read it, but I think it's true non the less.

"Life, and the perception we have of it, changes quickly."